Four Things I Don't Want to Hear When I Am 80

We all have older relatives or friends.  Heck, some of us might have already reached our golden years.  I still have a ways to go before I punch my AARP ticket; however, I already know that there are some phrases, which will irk me.  With that in mind, here are four things I don't want to hear from other people when I am 80.  For humorous purposes only-not to be taken (too) seriously.

You Look Good Today: How many of us have kindly patted one of our elderly friends or family members on the back, as we tell him or her that "you look good today."  If I were 80, I would shudder when someone uttered that phrase.  I would think, "Gee, am I supposed to look any other way?"  Seriously, every time I (the 80 year old me) heard someone say, "You look good today," I would shudder, as no one tells a 20-something that he or she looks good today (which implies that the person might not look so good tomorrow).   

I Haven't Seen You Since I Was Five: We can all relate to that one.  Uncle Johnny or Aunt Ethel stops into town (usually for a funeral) for the first time in a decade or two.  The elderly gent or lady realizes that everyone has aged significantly.  It is especially telling when an adult comes up to the out-of-towner and says, "Do you remember me?  When we last met, I had just started kindergarten."  Yikes!  What better way to remind someone that he or she is, er - graying, than to force that individual to face the fact that a whole generation has gone by in what seems like a heartbeat.  It is even worse if you cannot remember the person who is standing in front of you - all smiles - and recounting precise details from the time that he or she last met you. 

You Get Around Well: We have all probably uttered some derivation of this one at some point in our lives.  When I'm 80, I might not take well to hearing it, as I will be reminded that I can't move like I used to...

Do You Remember that Soda Shop: Yes, we all like to relive good memories, recount old (often embellished) stories of days gone by, and remember childhood friends.  However, I might have to look askance when someone asks me, "Do you remember the old soda pop (insert your favorite restaurant, store, etc.) place that used to be here.  Closed down, er might be 40 years ago now.  I sure did love that place."  Well, I might have loved that place as well, but really, I will feel old when I hear something like that.

Courtesy of Microsoft Office